Hey, They Call Me Connie…

Mondays, right? The notorious beginning of the week that everyone loves to hate. But what if I told you that there’s a way to make them just a little bit more bearable? Picture this: a calm, mindful start to your week where you push yourself toward your goals while remaining… relaxed. Sounds like a dream, doesn’t it?

My youngest niece, certainly has a way with words. Earlier this year, we decided to up our FaceTime game to ensure we were spending more time together. It started as a simple one-on-one chat but quickly evolved into a full-blown family Roblox call, often featuring about five people at once. (Side note: Gigi, if you’re reading this, I still owe you for pushing me off the bridge in that only.)

Now, let me set the scene for one of our more memorable moments. It was during one of these playdates, where my niece took on the role of chef and I, naturally, was the guest. The food? Purely pretend, of course, but that didn’t stop me from being hilariously difficult. I complained about every single plastic dish she made. To me, it was comedy gold. While she laughed alongside me, she also became joyfully exasperated, continuing to place faux food into plastic pots and pans until she finally snapped (in the cutest way possible), “Will you stop complaining?”

That line—it got me. I laughed harder than I had in weeks. And yes, I kept complaining because, come on, the service was horrible. My fake burger fell on the floor three times! Who’s eating that, kid?

This minor correction, delivered by a child, has become a memory I treasure. It’s one of those lines my sister and I toss around whenever we find ourselves venting too much. “Will you stop complaining?”—a gentle reminder that sometimes, we need to check ourselves before we get too deep into the negativity.

When life’s pressures mount, it’s all too easy to spiral into a vortex of what’s falling apart. And once you start riding that current of negativity, even the smallest tasks can feel like you’re drowning. I’ve been there. I’ve ridden that wave, and trust me, it’s exhausting. But I’ve found a way to push myself toward my goals without letting the undertow pull me under—what can I say, I’m fully embracing my soft girl era.

The Art of Pausing

Here’s the thing: I don’t shut down anymore when things get tough. I pause. It’s a subtle difference, but a game-changer nonetheless. If your version of a mental pick-me-up is stopping a task to watch an episode of your favorite show, then so be it. Or maybe it’s a quick workout at the gym. Whatever it is, make it happen. That mental break? It’s how you keep going.

David Goggins may be a bad**s (and let’s be real, he is), but becoming a machine isn’t the only way to achieve your goals. Some of us thrive in environments where we can give ourselves the grace we were never afforded. Be that person for yourself. Love yourself enough to take a moment when you need it.

Discipline: The Soft Girl’s Secret Weapon

Now, I know what you’re thinking—discipline and softness? Contradictory much? But stay with me; it’s necessary. Do what you say you’re going to do. Yes, that might mean adjusting your schedule by an hour or rearranging your week. But if you’ve committed yourself to a task, find the motivation to see it through to the finish line.

As corny as it might sound, affirmations have been my lifeline. I started by affirming myself in just one area of my life—every hour, on the hour—and gradually, I worked on mastering that area. Once I felt accomplished enough, I moved on and became Connie the Conqueror (No Aegon included—IFYKYK). You can use vision boards, apps, or a buddy system to keep yourself accountable. Just make sure it’s something that works for you, even when you’re running on empty and need that extra push.

Gratitude: The Antidote to Misery

Gratitude—it’s redundant, really, but essential. The most miserable people I know spend their days complaining about what’s wrong in their lives, the people they wish were different, or the things they lack. Don’t be that guy. Nobody likes that guy. That guy is a jerk that everyone tries to avoid, and even when he tries to mask his misery, it’s painfully obvious.

If you’re that guy, here’s a tip: stop being that guy. Today—thanks. Begin by acknowledging what you love about your life. I’ve got an abundance of things I’m grateful for, and those are the first things that leave my lips every morning. It’s a practice I’ve done for years and will continue to do because it works.

Privacy, Not Secrecy

Finally, let’s talk about privacy—because it’s different from secrecy, and I stand by that distinction. There are some goals, achievements, and intimate moments that you need to keep just for you. Why? Because sometimes, the outside world can taint your vision and erode your confidence to keep moving forward. Simply put, they can’t stop what they can’t see.

This was a hard lesson for me, but I’ve learned. Once you’ve been consistent with yourself and have proven that your discipline is solid, then maybe—just maybe—you’ll feel comfortable sharing your progress. But it’s perfectly okay to let privacy be your fuel. Trust that when things are ready, they will be revealed. They always are.

So, as you embark on another week, remember: pause when you need to, but push yourself when it counts. Find balance in discipline and gentleness, and always keep a little bit of your journey just for you. Oh, and the next time you catch yourself spiraling, just ask yourself—will you stop complaining?

Now, go conquer your Monday—softly.